Book Reflection - Engendering Motherhood by Martha McMahon
Engendering Motherhood: Identity and Self-Transformation in Women’s Lives
Motherhood is often framed as a biological event or a caretaking role. But for many women, it’s also a profound shift in identity—a reorientation of self that touches every dimension of life. Sociologist Martha McMahon’s concept of Engendering Motherhood brings attention to this deeper transformation, illuminating how becoming a mother reshapes how women see themselves, relate to others, and engage with the world.
At its core, engendering refers to the social and psychological process through which women come to "become" mothers—not just in function, but in identity. McMahon's findings are rooted in interviews with women who shared the monumental, often unexpected ways that motherhood changed them—not just how they lived, but who they believed themselves to be.
The Mother as a New Subject
Motherhood initiates what McMahon calls a "profound identity shift." Many women described a sense of coming into a new subjectivity—where their self was now intertwined with another's. This shift wasn’t simply about loss of autonomy, though that was part of the picture. More often, women spoke about expanding into a wider version of themselves: more capable, more feeling, more complex.
Rather than a reduction of self, the maternal experience, for many, marked an expansion of identity.
From Individual to Relational Self
McMahon observed that women's sense of self became more relational after becoming mothers. Their identity was no longer centered solely on individual achievement or autonomy but increasingly oriented toward connection. For some, this brought fulfillment. For others, it created tension with societal norms that prize independence and productivity.
This relational turn is often under-recognized in Western cultures, which tend to separate care work from identity or undervalue its significance in the adult life cycle. McMahon’s research reframes caregiving as a generative and identity-forming act.
A Moral Awakening
Motherhood also emerged as a moral turning point. Women reported developing stronger convictions about what mattered, what they stood for, and how they wished to live. Many felt that becoming a mother crystallized their values—whether around community, justice, work, or personal boundaries.
It was not uncommon for women to make major life changes—leaving a job, rethinking relationships, redefining success—as part of the internal recalibration brought on by motherhood. These changes weren’t necessarily planned. They were intuitive, even spiritual, responses to the demands and meanings that emerged through caring for a child.
The Role of Culture and Support
While many women experienced motherhood as deeply transformative, McMahon noted that this transformation was not always supported or recognized by society. Many mothers felt invisible in their internal changes, particularly in cultures that focus solely on infant development or view maternal identity as fixed or secondary.
This invisibility often led to feelings of isolation or conflict. Women were becoming someone new—but without a social script that honored this change.
Engendering Motherhood Today
McMahon’s work continues to resonate with women navigating early motherhood today. Whether through therapy, reflective writing, spiritual exploration, or conversations with other mothers, more women are seeking to name and honor the ways that motherhood has restructured their inner lives.
At its heart, engendering motherhood invites us to recognize maternal experience as a legitimate site of psychological, moral, and existential growth. Not just a chapter in a woman’s life, but a formative force in her becoming.
Curious about the transformative potential of motherhood? Shop here: Powerful Postpartum